ehke.

Things You Only Hear When You Live in Madrid

  1. “Oh yeah I’ll stop by tomorrow afternoon around 8pm.”
    I already knew that meal times here are off (lunch = 3-4pm & dinner = 9-10pm), but what I didn’t realize was how this completely alters the Spanish definitions of afternoon, evening, and night.  In fact, there is no such thing as an evening here.  Afternoon lasts until dinner, about 9 or 10pm, and then the night starts after that.  I didn’t figure it out until my landlord said he’d be over sometime in the afternoon… and then showed up at 7:30.
  2. “You’re a vegetarian? But you obviously still eat ham!”
    Yeah so Spain doesn’t quite understand this whole ‘no-meat’ thing.  Jamón is such a sacred part of their diet that it does’t count or they just can’t imagine the possibility of voluntarily choosing not to eat it? So all you herbivores might need to clarify that you don’t eat meat *or* ham during your next visit.
  3. “Are you of Atlético or Real Madrid?”
    Neither, duh. Athletic Bilbao for ever.  But if I had to pick, obviously Atlético.
  4. “I’m going to drive my normal car to go get the good cheese and normal bread.”
    normal cars are manual
    normal bread is a french loaf
    normal phones are androids (i.e. not iphones)
    still not sure what the good cheese is…. but definitely doing my best to taste test enough to find out.
    basically anything that is a typical favorite of Spain is “the good/normal one”
  5. “Ehke.”
    Sounds like a pokemon, but really is just Madridians mumbling the phrase “es que” which is a filler that’s the equivalent of “it’s like”.  Other popular mumblings include “en plan”, “bueno”  and “o sea”.
  6. “What do you mean they don’t listen to reggeaton in the US….”
    Reggaetón Lento – CNCO
    Échame La Culpa – Luis Fonsi & Demi Lovato
    Felices los 4 – Maluma
    Dura – Daddy Yankee
    El Amante – Nicky Jam
    You’re welcome!! 💃
  7. “Be careful this sauce* is super spicy, but like really spicy, eh? Like it’s very very spicy.  LOTS of spiciness. Spicy.” 
    *sauce in question has the flavor of greek tzatziki 
    This is a true story.  The waiter REALLY didn’t want me to order what I picked off the menu.  So disappointing when the “spice” was in fact, dill. 😑😑😑😑😑😑😑
    What’s a girl gotta do to get some real heat in her food around here?
  8. “Pass me the olive oil.”
    I swear to god the lettuce is already swimming in it, there’s no way you could possibly need another drop.  Although when I start to think about my own ranch consumption I realize it’s time to stop talking.

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